I've Really Gotta Stop Watching Stuff Like This At Work.

Aw HELL no, Rolf ain't giving up the good stuff without getting something in return...

Do As I Say, Not As I Do

It takes a lot for the Disgruntled Investor to go political on this site. In general, I hate politics and loathe what the constant childlike sniping between Democrats and Republicans is doing to this country. But sometimes, I see something that just makes me want to bang my head against my desk.

This, ladies and gentlemen, is why I hate politics.

-From the Associated Press

Clinton Opens Up About Attorney Firings

DES MOINES, Iowa (AP) - Democratic presidential hopeful Hillary Rodham Clinton on Monday dismissed any comparison between the firing last fall of eight U.S. attorneys with the replacement of 93 U.S. attorneys when her husband became president in 1993.

"That's a traditional prerogative of an incoming president," Clinton said in an interview with The Associated Press.

Once U.S. attorneys are confirmed, they should be given broad latitude to enforce the law as they see fit, she said.

"I think one of the hallmarks of our democracy is we have a devotion to the rule of law," Clinton said.

She conceded that should she win the presidency in 2008, she likely would replace all of the U.S. attorneys appointed by President Bush. She said that's merely following traditions in which presidents appoint prosecutors of their own party.

Clinton argued that the Bush administration's firing of the eight federal prosecutors has caused an uproar because it is seen as a conservative push to shift the balance of power in favor of the executive branch.

Democrats have accused the Justice Department and the White House of purging the prosecutors for political reasons. The Bush administration maintains the firings were not improper because U.S. attorneys are political appointees.


Could someone explain to me how these two statements from above...

-"She said that's merely following traditions in which presidents appoint prosecutors of their own party."
-"Democrats have accused the Justice Department and the White House of purging the prosecutors for political reasons."

...describe different things??

Meanwhile, there are 500,000,000 more important things our Congress could/should/won't be working on while this political piss-match goes on.

....That sound you hear is me banging my head against my desk, knowing that this is going to go on for at least another year and a half....

...Disgruntled

P.S. T-minus 8 days until the second house goes up for sale. Stay tuned!

Hello Rommie!!

So, I finally decided to respond (carefully) to one of these fake Craigslist Nigerian emailers. What follows is word for word, though I've anonymized certain parts:


----- Original Message ----
From: Rose Mary - slashremedy101@hotmail.com
Sent: Friday, March 9, 2007 10:41:24 PM
Subject: hello rommie......


My name is Rose, I am 26 yrs old female i have never been married..I am
Originally From London,i work as a marketer for a small grown up firm
Industry.I am Presently In London , I am a very dedicated individual who is
totally committed to human development, friendly, very trustworthy and value
relationship above anything.I love travelling,sporting and enjoy meeting
people around the world.I am an easy going person and like to have an
apartment/roommate who is very responsible and understanding, someone I can
really get along with. I will be arriving to the state by this month, and I
will also be staying for at least 6 months or more...before i can resume
back to work,Cos i am Currently on Vacation...

Fortunately, I saw your advert and I am sincerely interested in the room
as advertised and I will like to move in a soon as possible. Please I will
like to know the total cost for my initial move to the room including the
utilities. I need this info as soon as possible so as to arrange for you to
get the money prior for my arrival. As I will like to make an advance
payment ahead my arrival so that you can be rest assured that this is real
since I am not in the state presently. If you are interested in my proposal
kindly email me back..
My Warmest Regard
Rose

------------------------------------------------------------------
My Response:

DISGRUNTLED INVESTOR wrote:
The room costs $50,000 a day. Can you handle it?!?!?!?

------------------------------------------------------------------

Response I received from "Rosemary" - note the different email address...

From: tammy smart - tammyhole563@yahoo.com
Sent: Saturday, March 10, 2007 9:44:53 PM
Subject: Re: hello rommie......

Thanks alot for your response, how are you doing i hope great?Considered your request is okay by me and i will like to pay for six month rents...Thanks once again for replying back to my mail, that shows the sign of consciene that you have for me as a room.
I will be arriving before the 28th of this month i will like to move in there,i am willing to make an advance payment for three month in total.
But i am looking to stay for more than a Six month if applicable. but i will be moving in three weeks time,before the neccessary to move in,i am willing to make payment with a international postal money order or cashiers check... This will be easy for you as a citizen and a resident of Usa to cash immediately at your local bank. I will contact a client of mine who is owing me some couple of dollars and has been willing to pay through this means knowing that i will be moving to boardwalk of Newport Beach in no time ....to forward you this payment as my partner..So all i just require from you is getting the money order in your name....having it cashed and removing the total money for one month and help me sending back the remaining balance from it to my travelling agency which will be meant for my ticket fee to your place..Pls i want you to see this as a help you rendering to a apartment for me.......i am very honest lady to stay with and be with...listen to advice from other people ..i do not smoke..drink nor go out at night.
I am very understanding and reliable....pls if you are willing to help me kindly reply me with neccessary information Like:
YOUR FULL NAME
HOME ADRESS
STATE
CITY
COUNTRY
ZIPCODE
AND PHONE NUMBER
So that with this it will be easy for the chque to get toyou...ASAP!!!
Thanks
Rose Mary

-----------------------------------------

Gotta say...$50,000 a day rental income is pretty tempting...

But, how can you trust someone that does not drink or go out at night!

-Disgruntled A

PS Savannah was awesome for St. Pat's. I hope to have a picture up soon.

Who's Gonna Throw The Toilet Off The Roof?

So I've still got to finish my long posting about my Vegas "business" trip, including where I ran into half of my frat at Luxor, but:

a.) It's Wednesday
b.) I'm too lazy right now to finish it
c.) I've got a funny ass article instead.

If you've never been to Craigslist (or even if you have), there is a section of it called "Best of Craigslist," which I guess is the compilation of all of the ads or postings which have been voted in by viewers/readers. The Best Ofs typically fall under one of two categories:

1.) Pseudo-intellectual hippy b.s. (usually from UC-Berkeley)
2.) Ridiculous and hilariousness

This particular entry falls squarely in the second category.

The writer is from Washington, DC, which is hardly surprising, given the state of office bathrooms in this area.

Sadly, this could have been written by me (though not quite to the same extent). His comment about trying to avoid stall neighbors is right on.

Anyway, I'll post Vegas tomorrow.

Deez Nuts!
D.A.

Blim-Blam

A Vegas Recap

So, let me start this off by saying that I just went back and read the last Vegas posting I made, which I wrote at about midnite Vegas time after having just finished a yard (3 feet) of Pina Colada. That yard, which came in a bong-like tube with a neck strap, contained 15 shots of rum/coconut rum in it.

Despite that, I only misspelled one word - "completely".

Alright, so I am back from Las Vegas, narrowly missing the influx of NASCAR fans in town for that weekend's race. I came out up about $350 (might be more if my sports bets - Virginia to win the NCAA's and Georgetown to win the NCAA's - pan out), representing the first time in any of my visits to Vegas, Biloxi, or Atlantic City that I came out on top. The reason?

Craps.

But before I get into that, I want to first clarify a couple of details from that earlier post. As I said, that posting was made after downing a yard of pina colada, but it was the culmination of what might be the most fun night I've ever had. I, along with three other guys from my company, decided to make that night our "drinking night" (as opposed to our "gambling night"). After attending a number of FOIA-related seminars (and me getting railed by my former boss for being so naive as to think I wouldn't get unceremonially canned like he had been), we walked from our hotel/casino - Harrah's - to New York, New York for dinner. We wandered around the floor a bit (love it by the way) and stopped at Gallagher's Steakhouse after seeing meat curing in its windows (also their bartender looked like the hot lesbian who kissed Mischa Barton in that episode of the OC). Our company was giving us a prorated per diem of $35 a day (since breakfast and lunch were covered by the conference), and that ended up being the price of the steaks alone. But, oh boy, were they good steaks. We ended up getting "Cowboy Steaks", which were essentially T-Bone with more marbling, so more flavor from the fat. I chose the bearnaise sauce on the side as well. Awesome. The water waiter had the fakest Brooklyn accent I've ever heard, but our actual waiter seemed to be the real deal.

The steak was a good base for what came next. One of my coworkers, Chris, was bound and determined to find a yard of alcohol to drink. I suggested sticking with the half-yard, but, after he questioned my manhood I decided to go with the yard as well. We found our poison in a pavilion area near the M&M store. After the bartender handed me the yard of pina colada, I asked how much it was?

"$38," she replied.

But, to be fair, there were 15 shots of liquor in it, so I handed the lady my money, and, like Vikings, we set off to pillage and loot the town. Chris got a yard of strawberry daquiri (and he was questioning MY manhood), Jake got a half-yard of strawberry daquiri, and Doug countered with a half-yard of Long Island Iced Tea (which, frankly, is a lot of LIIT). We decided to head for the Luxor, which the other guys had never been to. I took several long pulls from the pina colada bong, and looked down to see that I had barely dented it. It was going to be a long night.

When we got to the Luxor, we were already starting to feel the effects of the drink bongs. Jake started randoming yipping and yelling out "BLIM-BLAM!!" Chris and I found ourselves in the difficult position of needing to pee, but having a yard-long drink bong hanging from our necks. And Doug had pretty much finished his LIIT, remarking that it was "mostly ice."

We walked through the gaming section of the Luxor, and wandered past the craps tables on our way towards finding a bathroom. I glanced back to the craps tables, thinking that:

a.) I really want to learn how to play craps, and
b.) That guy at that table looks REALLY familiar...

When I was in college, the frat class right under me ended up being surprisingly uptight and rebellious, so the next class (two years under me) was picked in response to that. Quite possibly the biggest bunch of lushes you will ever meet, and all very fun dudes. I ended up hanging out with those guys a lot, especially after they begged, nay, FORCED me to "haze" them (not that we ever do such things in frats). Actually, the only hazing going on was when I finally cut them off from the liquor, which they were consuming in disgusting portions. Then I sent them off to harass some of my pledge brothers. Ah, college.

Anyway, so that ENTIRE class was at this craps table at the Luxor. These guys were there for spring break (from grad school and from work apparently). They had brought along some of the subsequent pledges, who I hadn't met but who apparently had heard of me. One guy told me, "Boosh, I paid $1200 for you!" I have no idea what that means. So, I ended up learning, and playing, craps with these guys. Totally awesome. Most random, small-world moment of my life.

So, after playing craps with them for a while (and winning $12), we bong-drinkers left the Luxor to head back to Harrah's. At some point along the way, both Chris and I realized that we had finished all of the alcohol from our drinks, and were left with a couple of inches of pure syrupy, sugary drink mix. This might be hard to believe, but the 15 shots-full portion of the drink went down quite easily, while this portion was a nightmare. I felt like I was about to go into a diabetic shock every time I took a sip. After a couple of these sips, I decided I'd had enough, and gave my yard-drink-bong to some teenagers in back of me.

Surprisingly enough, this was the only law I broke in Las Vegas.

But back to craps. I usually stick to blackjack and poker when I go to casinos. And that was my plan for this trip - particularly the poker. But the experience at the Luxor got me, and my fellow yard-drink-bongers really siked on trying our hand at craps back at Harrah's. So we stuck with that game throughout the rest of the trip. Seemingly complicated, the game is actually quite simple. You place a bet on whether or not the person throwing the dice is going to hit a certain number. There are variations on this theme, but basically that's it. It's a very social game, and the potential to win big is huge. We had one guy throwing dice for a half-hour, because he hadn't crapped out on a 7 yet. That sequence alone netted me $100. Anyway, the one thing I took out of that was that playing craps during the day seemed to win us big, while playing at night (or at Paris, where the French continue to hate us) wiped us out. But, I'm a big craps fan now.

All in all, it was a great trip, and I ate some really incredible food (thank you per diem) - Gallagher's steak at New York/New York, Pork Tenderloin at Bobby Flay's restaurant Mesa Grill at Caesar's, and an awesome cheeseburger at Fatburger. Good times.

Alright, well I'm off to Savannah with the Disgruntled Girlfriend and some of my Disgruntled Friends for the greatest bash of them all, St. Patrick's Day. If you've never been to Savannah for St. Pat's, I HIGHLY recommend it. It's Mardi Gras without the murders.

Oh, also free wireless internet in the rooms, and I will be taking my computer. The possibility of drunken posts abounds!

BLIM-BLAM!!

-Disgruntled

Vegas

So it turns out theres no wireless in my room so live blogging = a little difficult.

But, I am intoxicated and I've found an internet booth.

So, without further ado...

HIGHLIGHTS THUS FAR...

-Not 2 hours into getting here, I won $50 on the slots...

-Not 12 hours later I lost it all on blackjack due to a damn closer brought in.

-Betting on UNC to beat Dook GIVING THE POINTS..only to learn that UNC was a 9.5 point favorite. And UNC covering the spread!!!!!

-The guy who hired me for my first job who had recently been fired giving me a lecture on how brutal the contracting biz is, and I should GET OUT!!!! TAKE IT FROM AN OLD SALT LIKE HIM!!!

-Finishing (inexplicably) a yard of pina colada

-Running into half of my frat brothers at the Luxor...completeley unexpected. And playing and winning at craps with them. What are the odds?!?!?!!

Anyway, I'll try to post more later, but right now I've got to pass out and get up in a few hours to sit in more boring and useless seminars.

Disgruntled A...reporting from Vegas

The Worst Idea Ever

Haven't these people ever seen a horror movie before. Specifically, "Pet Sematary"?!?!?!?!

http://www.palmbeachpost.com/localnews/content/local_news/epaper/2007/03/01/m1a_DIGMUP_0301.html

Having had experience yelling at my dog to shut up when she barks in the middle of the night (at evil, presumably), I can only imagine the difficulty these new owners will have. Good luck with all that.

Wot's All This Then?

So it's Wednesday, and I had a tough time deciding between "Chicken Police" and "Beatbox Flute Inspector Gadget Remix."

The chicken win in a close, hard-fought victory. They're really keeping the peace out there.

The Disgruntled Investor Learns How To Use The Link Tool

I'm planning on "live-blogging" on my drunkenness/gambling from Vegas starting this Saturday...assuming Harrah's has free in-room wireless internet access. After that, I'll probably be posting more frequently here, as March is going to be pretty crazy busy on the housing front. I dropped by the place I'm selling last night to accomplish two things:

1.) Remind the grown adults who live there that they need to take the trash out rather than let it lie around for weeks;

2.) Give them their 30-day notices due to the impending April listing of the house for sale. I told them that actually they are free to stay there (and pay rent) during the sales period, but that they'd have to be willing to put up with major renovations, immaculate cleanliness, and random people trampling through the place at a moment's notice. We'll see what happens, but I did get their March rent checks, so that, at least, assuaged my fears of a "That's it, I'm moving out today!" moment.

So, the plan is to replace the carpet, replace/update the hardware throughout the house, replace the faucets, paint a little, and maybe do the granite countertop thing - though I'm still not sold on the necessity for that. I was kind of on the fence about the whole selling it now thing, but a house in the neighborhood where I live, which is comparable to the one I'm selling and only 5 minutes away, sold in about 5 days recently. Their open house occurred during a major snowstorm. That's a pretty decent sign. Also, this article is about as close to cautiously optimistic as the media will ever be on the subject. Anyway, who knows, I really just want to get rid of the thing. Stupid house.

By the way, I'm not entirely sure if I explained the necessity of cleanliness to the dominant or submissive personality of the guy in the 2nd bedroom. Seemed pretty submissive to me.

On a different note, here's an interesting article related to HAHNus Wagner and the whole tobacco card phenomenom.

And finally, AL GORE FOR PRESIDENT!! Jim Treacher at The Daily Gut said it best: "What the hell is he doing in there? Is he a Terminator from the future and needs constant recharging?"

Late Edition Update: Uh...damn, looks like it's a good thing I sold off my stocks last week.

I ended up selling Cisco for 27.60 a share (a gain of about 30 cents a share from when I bought it), and Knot for 25.10 a share (a loss of 2.23 a share).

Today, at market close:
CSCO - 25.71
KNOT - 23.20

Boy, China's a real jerk, huh?

Free Schaub!!

From the Atlanta-Journal Constitution:

"The Falcons do not want to lose Matt Schaub and plan to place a one-year contract tender on him, possibly in excess of $2 million, as well as a compensation attachment of a first and/or third-round draft pick. The high ransom could discourage some teams, however, a straight trade for a draft pick or a player should not be ruled out."

This has actually been going on for several years now. Schaub was rumored to be a candidate for the Redskins' QB carousel before (and after) Gibbs picked up Mark "The ground's not an eligible receiver?? Who knew??" Brunell. I've long advocated having the Falcons use a 2-QB/2-RB system, in which Schaub takes the snaps while Vick and Dunn sit in the backfield. It's the perfect system because defenses would not know what to do if/when Schaub handed off to Vick. Would he run (which he does very well) or throw (which he does at least as well as any other RB)? Vick would obviously have to improve (or develop) his blocking skills, but other than that it would create an explosive and less predictable offense, which the Falcons have been sorely lacking for several years now. Bobby Petrino, of course, is not going to do this, and is going to keep Vick as the starting QB and Schaub as the prisoner on the sidelines. Even when they're losing, Vick fills the Georgia Dome, and of course that's all that matters. This is also known as the "Dan Snyder Principle."

I've been trying to come up with a precedent for this situation, but in every scenario I can think of, the backups were either traded, left via free agency, or became the everyday guy for good after the starter went down. The most recent example I can think of is Kurt Warner and every team he's ever been a part of. Warner, that is, being in the Vick position.

Who knows, maybe Schaub likes it this way??

In other UVA news:

Miami 68, UVA 60.

Doh!

I Swore I Wouldn't Get Political...

But it's Wednesday, which means no talk about investing. And the irony of this was too good to pass up.

Ladies and Gentlemen, a peace activist assaulting war defenders. (tip o' the hat to the Daily Gut)

http://www.fredericksburg.com/News/FLS/2007/022007/02202007/261345

Fun fact - I'm from this town!!

A Moral Dilemma

So this posting should resonate with any guy (or girl) who's ever collected sports cards and/or memorabilia.

One hot summer day after I'd graduated from high school, I wandered into a local sports memorabilia store next to a Baskin Robbins. I was flush with cash from relatives, and it was, as usual, burning a hole in my pocket. I had long since given up on collecting contemporary sports cards (since the market had been flooded with a glut of sports cards since the early 1990's), but had maintained my fascination with old cards. I began perusing the counters and shelves, and did a double-take when I saw a truly ancient-looking card innocently resting between a Hank Aaron and a Roger Clemens. It wasn't in great shape, but it was a 1914 Honus Wagner tobacco card.

Honus Wagner, a shortstop for the Pittsburgh Pirates in the early days of the "modern" era of baseball, was staunchly anti-smoking. Once he found out that tobacco companies were using his likeness for cards inserted in tobacco boxes, he demanded they cease and desist, as he feared children buying the addictive weed just to have his baseball card (which is what I would have done had I grown up a kid in the 1910's). For this reason, Honus Wagner tobacco cards are extremely rare and valuable, fetching hundreds of thousands, or even millions of dollars in auctions - most famously by Wayne Gretzky. Most Honus Wagner cards in existence today feature advertisements for candy on the backs. Evidently smoking was bad, but rotten teeth and diabetes were bully! Anyway, the lady behind the counter, who told me she thought no one would want this card because it's "so old," was selling this card for $150. The money lighting up my pocket had found a home.

As you can see above, the card is not in great shape, but given its age would not be considered to be in as bad a shape as if it were a card from, say, 2000. Based on Becketts and recent EBay auctions, it appears that I could realistically clear $2000 for the card were I to sell it today.

And herein lies my dilemma.

Without a doubt, a return on investment of over 1000% in eight and a half years is pretty good. And, without a doubt, I could use that money. BUT, the problem is that it's a pretty damn cool baseball card, and would be difficult to give up.

The question for you, dear readers, is what would you do in this situation?? At what point is it ok to sell prized baseball cards/comics/toast with the Virgin Mary burnt into it??

Comments would be much appreciated.

Disgruntled out.

Tonight

I've had a few to drink, I'm tired, and the Disgruntled Girlfriend needs attention.

Tomorrow, I will post my baseball card dilemma, and believe me...it's a doozy.

Oh yeah, and there was an awesome Three Stooges marathon on Spike TV today, thus keeping that channel in the realm of relevancy...at least for today.

Of Course He Is

This is an absolutely true story.

I woke up this morning with three things on my mind - one, I had to take the Disgruntled Dog to Petsmart for a bath/groom so her smell would stop making small children cry; two, I had two showings for the loft room in the place I failed to sell last summer; three, the Disgruntled Girlfriend and I had a wine tasting party to attend later tonight. Everything seemed in order...

...until about 8 AM, when the Disgruntled Girlfriend awoke to take the Disgruntled Dog out before she went to the gym for her morning workout. Upon opening the door, she discovered that when the Disgruntled Dog came upstairs this morning at 6 AM, scratching at the door, it was to let us know that she had just taken a giant dump outside our room. She followed this up by puking twice downstairs.

We cleaned this mess up, and after taking the Disgruntled Dog to Petsmart at 10 AM, I came home and got myself ready for the day - showering, shaving, and shitting (the three sh's, as I like to call them). I came out, put my clothes on, and picked up my cell phone only to discover that one of my tenants (in the place I am planning on trying to sell this spring) had called and left a message. I've gotten to the point where I dread everytime they call, but, reluctantly, I listened to the message, which was a simple request to call him back. I did.

Here's where things started to get weird.

Tenant A told me that he and Tenant B had had just about enough of Tenant C, who was the newest addition to the house. Besides his being a night-owl, and a noisy one at that, he was despicably filthy. He never took his trash out, he haphazardly cleaned the dishes, and, most disturbingly, he had recently taken a dump in the toilet in the bathroom that he shares with Tenant A, and evidently had managed to smear his defecation on the seat - leaving it there for who knows who to clean up. It appeared that Tenant C and the Disgruntled Dog had something in common. Tenant A let me know that he was considering looking for another place, as was Tenant B. He also informed me that he thought that Tenant C had "MTV" or something. I didn't know what MTV was, but I apologized for his antics, since he seemed perfectly normal to me when I interviewed him. I let him know that the two options we had were for me to call Tenant C and get him to shape up, or, since he's on a month-month lease, I could kick him the hell out. He said he'd talk it over with Tenant B and get back to me.

I had two great showings over at my first place, and picked the Disgruntled Dog up from Petsmart. She looked (and more importantly smelled) great. When I arrived home, the Disgruntled Girlfriend suggested that we go out for sushi for lunch, but stop at our favorite wine shop beforehand for a wine tasting. I'm always up for wine tastings, so I heartily agreed.

We got to the wine shop (called the Curious Grape, by the way, it's a top-notch wine shop), and what to my wandering eyes did appear, but Tenant A and his girlfriend, in line for the tasting. After exchanging greetings and joining them for the tasting, I asked him if he had talked to Tenant B yet regarding his Phantom Shitter roomate. He replied that he hadn't, and further expanded on Tenant C's..."issues."

Here's where things got REALLY weird.

Tenant A told me that he thought Tenant C had Multiple Personality Disorder (or MPD, aka "MTV" - stupid cellphone). I said, "You're shitting me?" He said, "No." (ed. note - that's what the toilet said to Tenant C, hey-oh!) Since they share a bathroom, which is right next to Tenant A's room, Tenant A had noticed strange sounds coming from the bathroom whenever Tenant C was in it. He talked to himself on the toilet (and at the dinner table), and when he showered, Tenant A could clearly hear "a masculine voice and a submissive voice" (his words). His girlfriend suggested that maybe he was taking a shower with another guy. Tenant A said he hoped not, but didn't think that was the case. Personally, I was praying for this guy to be gay, so I didn't have to deal with "Me, Myself, and Irene."

So, anyway, now I have a filthy, disgusting, possibly one-in-a-million insane tenant in the place.

But here's the kicker: THIS GUY IS NOW THE SECOND MENTALLY DISTURBED INDIVIDUAL IN THAT PLACE IN ONE YEAR'S TIME. For those who don't know what I mean, read some of the earlier posts.

I mean, seriously, what are the fucking odds?!?!?!

Talk about a black cloud over my disgruntled head!

Semi-weekly Video Clip

Yesterday was a snow day, which means today is kind of the make-up Wednesday. Since Wednesday has been my irregular, semi-weekly, posting of videos day, I'll do it today instead.

This video can be summed up in one word: totally awesome.

If I could make things like this, I'd quit my job right away and only do this. This will be the best five minutes and two seconds of your day. Enjoy.